11 Comments

He Cares

bunnyEven as long as I’ve been a Christian, sometimes I still fall into the trap of wondering if God is really there, and if He really cares about me.

Two things happened, right in conjunction with one another, in the past couple weeks that proved, once again, that He is and He does.

The first is an ongoing issue regarding God’s provision. I don’t want to get into all the details, because it’s a fairly personal thing within my family, but suffice it to say it was an issue that was causing me severe amounts of stress.

The second involves my pet rabbit.

Now, the first thing kept seeming to get worse and worse, and no matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t seem to solve the problems we were having. Anyone who knows me knows I’m pretty mellow, low-key, and easy going. Bad things happen and I’m usually pretty good with rolling with them. It takes a lot to stress me out. So when I say I was literally losing sleep over this issue, understand how serious it was to me. I prayed and prayed, asking God what was going on, reminding Him that He promises to provide for us, and why hasn’t He done so yet?

This went on for a couple of weeks.

Now, in the midst of this stress, came the issue with the rabbit. In Phoenix right now the weather is positively gorgeous. It is peaking at about 85 degrees in the middle of the afternoon, and mornings and evenings are downright chilly. When it’s not too hot out, we let our pet rabbit out into the back yard to play and get some exercise. Being a burrowing creature by nature, he likes to find little nooks and crannies to hide in, his favorite being the spot between the house and the storage shed. When he gets back there, it’s almost impossible to get him out. I’ve even tried climbing on the fence and lying on the top of the shed roof with a broom and trying to shoo him out, but it’s nearly impossible unless he wants to come.

So, since the weather was nice anyway, I just left him out there, figuring he’d come out when he got hungry.

And he did.

Only, unbeknownst to me, my son had run into the gate with his bicycle enough times that the loose slat I thought I’d fixed came off again.

Sometime in the night, Bunny made a break for it.

I went out the next morning to check on him and he was nowhere to be found. Worse, I couldn’t go look for him because I had to get my kids ready for school, and immediately after that I had to babysit my friend’s four kids for the next few hours.

By the time I was finally free to go looking beyond my immediate yard, Bunny had been missing for who knows how many hours. Still, though, I had to try. I walked up and down the alley behind our house, down the street in every direction, glancing under trees and bushes and carrying treats to woo him with.

We live right on the corner of a major street and a very well-traveled residential street, and half a mile from a mountain preserve where coyotes and other critters roam freely. I walked around for over half an hour, hoping against hope that I’d find him, but there were just too many places he could’ve gone, not the least of which was the busy street where he’d be sure to get smooshed.

As I walked, I prayed, God, please send a miracle. I can’t find him. There’s no way to find him on my own.

Meanwhile, I was thinking about how I would break the news to my kids when they got home from school.

I checked outside several times, even leaving food and water by the back gate where he’d escaped.

I broke the news to the kids that evening, still holding out hope that he’d return. And the evening and the morning were the first day. He’d been gone more than 24 hours. My husband asked how long we were going to hang onto his cage and paraphernalia. I said at least one more day. Just in case.

Meanwhile, I was still stressing over the other issue. The bunny situation on top of everything else, and I really felt like God didn’t care, wasn’t listening. Where are you, God? Did you promise to take care of us? Didn’t you say we’re more valuable than sparrows, and you know every time one of them falls? Didn’t you promise you’d take care of our needs?

And the evening and the morning were the second day.

I was out of hope, out of options, out of faith.

I went outside, not really expecting anything, because after more than two days, there was no way, but I had to at least see.

And there he was.

The bunny was in our yard, hopping around, like he’d never left.

Now, just in case you’re thinking he was just hiding, he wasn’t. I scoured every inch of that yard, including behind (and even in) the storage shed, more than once. Moreover, he’d escaped before (that time I found him in the bushes just outside the fence—and yes, I checked there, too, and he wasn’t just hiding) through that same slat that was broken that I fixed that was broken again. He really was gone. And he really just showed up in my yard after it was impossible.

And when I saw that bunny sitting there in my yard, it was like God said, “I got this. Calm down. It’s handled.”

It was almost a week before I saw the second miracle. I didn’t know how it was going to happen, but the bunny gave me the assurance I needed to hang on to my faith.

God provided.

Manna from heaven, something there is no possible way to explain or rationalize outside of God’s direct hand, He blessed us with exactly what we needed.

EXACTLY. What we needed.

God is there. He is taking care of me. He is concerned with everything, from the huge, life-changing events, to the little lost bunnies.

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About Avily Jerome

Avily Jerome is a writer and the editor of Havok Magazine. Her short stories have been published in various magazines, both print and digital. She has judged several writing contests and is a writing conference teacher and presenter. She writes speculative fiction, her ideas ranging from almost-real-world action/adventures to epic fantasies to supernatural thrillers.

11 comments on “He Cares

  1. There is an “archetype” in our minds which some call “aspiring” – because the “cognitive process” connected to it always *aspires* to do well at what it does, but is inconsistent at doing its job and therefore always seems to doubt it CAN do well even when it DOES do well. This affects everybody, Christian or not. But I’ve observed in myself and my Christian friends that this is one of the biggest chinks in our armor that the world, the flesh and the Devil can exploit.

    It sounds like you and I have the same chink. If we have the same “personality type”, as I suspect, this is expected.

    I don’t want to give myself glory under the pretext of giving God glory, but I DO believe God led me to see a consistent connection – and a consistent pattern in that connection – between the Jungian “Ego” and “cognitive processes” – biblically, the “spirit in man” and the thoughts of the brain it searches – and the Nine Beatitudes in order. In other words, Jesus Christ not only anticipated Carl Jung by almost two millennia, but He also anticipated the Jungians’ realization that “character is what you DO about your personality”.

    The chink of which I speak, in people like me (and I suspect, in you also) relates to a lesson in virtue which I know for my part is very hard to learn but which truly applies in such situations:

    “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

    • John, I’d be interested to hear more about this connection you see between the biblical perspective on our thinking and modern psychology’s. And to hear more about your approach or how it applies to situations like this. Do you have a blog post about it somewhere? Feel free to contact me privately if that seems better.

      • I have a separate blog which I have yet to really flesh out. I had more on a former iteration but took that version down and I don’t have all the data rewritten. I can give you a summary here, starting first with the blog address:

        Island, Sea and Sky
        http://islandseaandsky.wordpress.com/

        This Web site explains the “cognitive processes” of our brains and defines them, and also shows the “archetypes” in which each normally falls within a particular “core personality type” (mine is ENFP, as shown on my blog):

        Cognitive Dynamics
        http://www.cognitiveprocesses.com/

        To this one must add the need, first of all, to submit one’s “ego” – the biblical “spirit in man” – to God’s Spirit and that is what the First Beatitude is all about. In imitation of the usual shorthand for the “Jungian cognitive processes”, I label this need Hs (for Holy Spirit, that is, what a religious Jungian might call “God-consciousness” but which the Bible calls a personal relationship with, submission to and reliance on God, a broader definition).

        I just remembered that I have two posts on my creative writing blog which deal with this subject as it relates to my fictional Lightchildren. The second post spells out the correlation I discovered in full. Here is that second post.

        Tales of the Undying Singer
        http://undyingsinger.wordpress.com/2013/10/04/the-white-hand-and-the-adami-psyche-part-02/

        Just put in “part-01” if you want the first post. It’s longer and less directly relevant.

        Further questions may be directed to johanan_rakkav @ yahoo dot com. 🙂

      • In the Part 02 post, the list I give shows the order of the “cognitive processes” as they correlate first with the Ego’s submission to God and then to how each CP in order relates to each Beatitude in order. Forgive the abbreviations here, as you read further you’ll learn what they mean:

        Blessed are the poor in spirit – Hs
        Blessed are those who mourn – Si (reviewing the past, as Avily does above)
        Blessed are the meek – Se

        … and so on in functional pairs … 🙂

  2. You know much of our story. And now I will praise with and pray concerning yours.

    • Thank you Evonne!
      Yes, I remember many similar struggles you guys have had. And I am also aware how you’ve been instrumental in blessing others.

  3. Avily, I never tire of hearing these sorts of testimonies. So glad you shared. It brought back memories of the times God has reminded me of His faithfulness and encouraged me today. Thank you!

    • We measure God’s faithfulness to us by His “track record” with us and any such measurement we make against the past or against a standard uses a broad “cognitive process” called Introverted Sensing (Si). That’s why I think it applies to Avily’s situation above.

      It can be painful to consider the past as Si does, either via learning from “the School of Hard Knocks” (i.e., from one’s mistakes against God’s standard of righteousness) or via seeing the loss of things (real or apparent) that once were (even of the past fidelity of God to His promises). Either way, one mourns. And if Avily is a fellow ENFP with me, both of us happen to find that situation very, very hard to bear – even more than most people. ENFPs and ENTPs who have Christian faith aspire to look to God’s track record and remember it (and thus be comforted by it) but often feel as if they’ll never get that virtue “down pat”.

      There are probably yet other connections in the Bible with this “way of seeing” in the mind and the mourning which may result from it. But that is why the corresponding Beatitude is so precious: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

      Here is a deeper example from a Psalm of Asaph. (Given how he writes his words and music – as Suzanne Haik-Vantoura showed, the music is still there in the Masoretic Text! – my guess is that he was an ENTP and not an ENFP like Solomon.) I’ll put in samples from two different versions so as to convey the intent of the Hebrew wording precisely.

      (Psa 77:6 NKJV) I call to remembrance my song in the night; I meditate within my heart, And my spirit makes diligent search.

      This is exactly what a Jungian psychologist means by the Ego (the biblical Spirit) relating to the cognitive processes of the Self (the biblical Heart in its broadest sense).

      While yet being a “beggar in spirit” relating to God, Asaph yet is troubled with regard to “Blessed are those who mourn”. But God does comfort him:

      (Psa 77:7 RSV) “Will the Lord spurn for ever, and never again be favorable?
      (Psa 77:8 RSV) Has his steadfast love for ever ceased? Are his promises at an end for all time?
      (Psa 77:9 RSV) Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he in anger shut up his compassion?” Selah [this is sung too – it means “Weigh this!”]
      (Psa 77:10 RSV) And I say, “It is my grief that the right hand of the Most High has changed.”
      (Psa 77:11 RSV) I will call to mind the deeds of the LORD; yea, I will remember thy wonders of old.
      (Psa 77:12 RSV) I will meditate on all thy work, and muse on thy mighty deeds. (…)

    • I’m so glad you were touched by it! Thanks for reading!

      • And I thank you and the editor for putting up with my verbiage.

        “Manna from heaven, something there is no possible way to explain or rationalize outside of God’s direct hand, He blessed us with exactly what we needed. EXACTLY. What we needed.”

        Love. It.

        And that’s what the *First Beatitude is meant to teach us. 🙂 One can explain after the fact how God deals with our minds – but not the fact He deals with our minds. There is the miracle.

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