We now resume the transcript of a conversation between crickets in Avily’s walls, a continuation of this transcript:
Now, I know what you’re thinking, and let me assure you, that way only leads to being the center of a floor-shoe sandwich. I know, I know, this is war. But sometimes in war when you’re out-manned and out-gunned, you have to change your tactics. Rethink your strategies.
I’m talking about sabotage.
I get it, you’re a soldier. You like things straight-forward. Man-to-cricket combat. I’ve been there. I understand. But this is not a matter of being dishonorable. Guerrilla warfare is part of our makeup. Being underhanded and sneaky is what we do.
Let me give you an example.
Don’t get me wrong, we can eat through anything. Why, I’ve gnawed my way through more than one sheet of drywall and a fair bit of carpet, too, but clothes are my favorite and I’ll tell you why.
It’s not just about the comfortable, home-cooked flavor of cotton or the way silk slides over your tongue. There’s nothing like a nibble of freshly-washed blouse in my opinion, but what gives it that extra zip is not the flavor of dryer sheet or the synthetic blend of the fabric. No, the sweetness comes from the knowledge that with every bite you’re destroying the enemy a little at a time.
No, I’m serious. Think about it. You’ve gorged yourself in Avily’s closet, and she goes to get dressed up to go somewhere special and when she puts on her new favorite shirt, it’s riddled with holes. Not only have you ruined a perfectly good piece of clothing which she now has to wear for painting or throw out, you’ve also killed a little piece of her soul. You’ve showed her that no matter how many traps she sets, no matter how much insecticide she sprays, you’ve won. Even if she kills you, she can never get that shirt back.
That’s what I mean by sabotage. It’s destroying the enemy one outfit at a time.