Some of them are important for my writing career. I NEED to write and submit short stories to keep my name circulating and getting attention from readers. I NEED to blog. I OUGHT to to read blogs occasionally. I NEED to update my Facebook fan page. Oh, and once in awhile I actually need to work on my WIP. Or my other WIP. Or my other other WIP.
Some of them are important for my kids. SOMEBODY needs to be the room mom. The teacher needs someone to organize and communicate to the other parents and plan things like the basket for the fundraiser auction and the parties. In the other child’s class, SOMEBODY needs to help with the Book Chat groups. I’m a mom, and I NEED to be involved in my kids’ school, and I’m a writer, so if I’m not willing to lead a Book Chat group, who will? Not to mention there are sports schedules that need to be coordinated and playdates that need to be organized and birthday parties that need to be attended.
And some of them are important for me. I NEED to go to MOPS. It’s one of the few times I get child-free adult interaction. I NEED an occasional date night It’s one of the few times I actually have a conversation with my husband that consists of more than “Will you be home in time to take Bigs to Taekwondo and what do you want for dinner?” I NEED to serve in my church. I NEED to keep my house from becoming a health code violation.
I look at other moms. Some of them work full time or have grand and beautiful ministries they pour themselves into. Some of them have immaculate houses. Some of them are writers who have published multiple books or who are constantly updating their various social networks with their latest wordcount goals. Some of them are dealing with debilitating sicknesses or special needs kids. Some of them go to the gym and perfect their bodies. Some of them cook actual meals using the stove instead of the microwave, and involving multiple food groups.
I look at all the things I HAVE to do. Some of them I do because I’m passionate about what I’m doing and what is being accomplished and what the end result will be. Some of them I do because I enjoy them. Some of them I do because it’s expected of me. Some of them I do because they need to be done and no one else is going to to it. And some of them I do because I don’t want to be “that mom” who always says no and can’t be counted on and doesn’t pull her fair share of the weight. I do them because I’m asked and I feel guilty saying no. I do them because I worry someone will think I’m a lazy lump who just sits around on the computer all day playing games. And because sometimes I don’t realize just how much I’ve bitten off until I’m choking on it.